New year is here

2009 has come to an end.  And around this time, everyone is wishing, on tv, on radio, in the papers, for a happy new year. A new year always produce new hope and we all, hope for everything to be good and better.

Eventhough,  realistically, if we want things to change, first and foremost we must change. All the hoping and wishing  and wishing and hoping are never enough.   If we want a better life, we must be a better person first. If we are the same as yesterday, how can things be different tomorrow? It does not take a new  year to change you, neither it takes an old year to make you stay the same.  If we can change the hopes into efforts into achievements, then our wishes of good things have more chances to materialize. True or not true?

What do you plan for the new year? To be a better person, better mother, better career, look prettier, relax more, work less, improve our ibadat, spend less, exercise more? The list goes on.

My new year plan is to improve my vision. To see clearer. Use better lenses.

Sometimes things have evolved so much but we are still holding on to our past.  Everything evolve. Everything start, grow then grow old and die. Even the things and people around us.  Time to  look at what is left in your life, what has ended and what is still there.  Look at what we still like, what we don't like anymore, what we will never dislike. What is good, what is bad and what looks good but is bad, and what bad that became good. What is good but we never saw.

I want to look at what I can do and what, actually , I cannot do.Most importantly, what to hold on to, and what to let go.

I want the new year to be good, so I want only to pick the good and go from there, insyaAllah...and eventhough our new year had started on 1st of Muharram, but 2010 is a universal celebration as far as the world goes, so,  to those I love, happy new year 2010, don't forget to change the date....

truth can be stranger than fiction

I am planning to write a book and I am also planning to stop blogging for a while. But I don't know whether I can write a book or not.

I was looking through some writers' websites for inspiration and to see how small I am compared to them. Very very very small. A drop in the ocean, as they say.   I went to Danielle Steel, J K Rowling, Adeline Mah, Yan Martel, Doris Mortman. They are my favourite writers. Their books are mesmerising and I can read them over and over again. How did they write such wonderful books.  Such huge talents. I only have 7 readers of my new and unknown blog, aishah, hajar, mimi (I remind them to read everyday ) Intan, Adi , Melissa and whoever 'guest' is, and I want to write a book?  Maybe I am a dreamer more than anything else. But do you know, a friend at persidam, Kak Yati, one day brought out a book she wrote out of her bag? That was more surprizing, because, she was quietly learning pengajian Islam everyday,sitting next to me.  A diligent matured student, face in kitab all the time, showed me her book on 'Memasak untuk remaja' all printed with illustrations. There you are....tak sangka.

Danielle Steel went through alot in her personal life. How strong she is to survive the heartbreaking experiences , similar to the heroin in her stories. Maybe that inspired her to write. I have, in my life, gone through some things that we find in novels and tv dramas.  I believe many story books are based on   someone's real  experiences, but made readable and more interesting  to sell. Only that in real life, the pain is real.

I will try, ok? Bismillahirohmanirohim. As what I like to say to my boys in Rumah Aman when they feel apprehensive, JUST TRY. Wish me luck and pray that I complete it.

Flowers of many colours

If you have read the book ' falling leaves' where the writer wrote about her life at the time when  she had underwent the whole cycle from birth to growing up, until the age where all her  experiences start to fall back onto the ground where it started , hense the title ' the falling leaves'. I am a bit younger than her but my leaves are starting to change colour too......so lets type away....

Imagine this.  A tree with a bark  and 3 big branches far apart.  One branch with purple flowers , one with blue, and one with gold. That is my family tree.

Before when I was young, to me,  this was a distorted tree, strange and confusing.  I wanted an oak tree or whatever local tree that is shady and normal for a family tree.

Yesterday I went to a wedding of a relative from one of these branches. My late mum for her own reasons had kept away from this side of her family so we hardly  meet.  Now so many years had passed and an invitation was thrown my way, I thought I would accept and meet them again. They were all in purple, so I put them on the purple branch. My grandmother remarried a Syed, so they are all syeds and syarifahs, with  the features such as brown hair and long noses that comes with that title. 

The gold branch, I always meet. Uncles and Aunts from my grandfather's side.  On the next coming wedding,  they all plan to wear gold, (gold??!) so I chose that colour for them. For one thing, they all like gold, being kelantanese who are very 'jangok' (well dressed),  and a few of my aunts have risen to high positiions in life, and probably use gold credit cards, so I shall put them on the gold branch.

And the blue branch belongs to us. My late mum is the only child of the marriage between Bibi Zaharah Bahram Khan to Daud bin Sulaiman, a teacher.. So since we all wore blue at Hassan's wedding, we are the blue flowered branch. The smallest of the three branches and well, lets say, had endured many a strong wind.

This is not uncommon, as divorce  runs in many families and some are laced with bickerings and feuds that  separate the families from coming together and cutting all ties. But, blood is always thicker than water, and  time and many things can make them meet  again in the future.

We read about family reunions that have so many members, its very endearing and wonderful. They are united and hopefully, living harmoniously together, the whole big bunch of them.

However your family is, an oak tree or a funny tree, when we meet, we know we are related and that is what blood ties is all about.

between two classes (antara dua darjat)

Yesterday I received an email that showed a few examples of the luxuries belonging to the King of Brunei.  MasyaAllah rezeki  yang Allah beri pada dia. Boleh di katakan  duduk dalam Istana emas,  sebab  barang dan perkakas baginda  banyak yang di perbuat daripada emas.  Kalau kita bangga kita punya gelang dan rantai emas,  cuba fikir sinki nya sahaja di buat daripada emas.  Saya pernah dengar dulu, labuci-labuci di pakaian Sultanah Brunei itu sebenarnya berlian, apetah lagi yang lain-lain.  Bagaimana agaknya hidup dalam serba kegermilapan kerana yang melitupi mereka, yang shining and sparkling semuanya.  Seharusnya  yang pudar pun  jadi bersinar.

Semalam juga saya menonton program Bersama Mu, di mana dipaparkan kisah seorang nenek yang menjaga 5 orang cucu-cucu yang kehilangan ibu bapa.  Mereka tinggal di rumah usang dan nenek itu pun semakin uzur, terpaksa minta bantuan.  Kalau kita yang masih gagah ini sentiasa berfikir bagaimanala masa depan anak kita, ini kan nenek tua tersebut.  Lebih berat lagi kerisauan beliau sebab duit tak ade, kekuatan tak ade, cucu pun semakin besar, semakin banyak keperluan dan cabaran.

Dalam hidup ini Allah telah jadikan segala sesuatu mengikut kadar yang tertentu.  Ada orang kaya, ada pulak yang miskin. Ada orang sihat, ada pulak yang sakit.  Ade yang pandai, ada yang kurang pandai. Semuanya mengikut ilmu Allah yang maha bijaksana.  Tak terjangkau oleh akal kita aturan Allah di seluruh alam ini.

Kita sebagai hamba Nya hendak lah mendalami ilmu Nya, barulah kita  faham.  oooh gitu...yang kaya kena tolong yang miskin.....oooh gini,,,yang susah  dapat pahala dengan setiap detik dia bersabar......oooo.....yang pandai ada tanggung jawab menjalankan fardhu ain, fardhu kifayah......yang pandai jadi guru-guru mengajar yang kurang pandai.....yang kurang pandai akan bantu yang pandai dalam membuat sesuatu.  Kalau semua jadi doktor, sapa pulak yang pergi ke hospital?Kalau semua nak mengajar, siapa nak isi kelas kelas ?

Kalau boleh kita nak jadi yang merawat dan mengajar tapi mungkin Allah dah atur sebaliknya.  Kita jadi yang tak berape seronok tu. Kita yang di cucuk jarum, kita yang di marahi kerana tak faham faham, kita yang poket kosong dan kita yang tak boleh duduk rileks kerana kerja bertambun tambun dan besok tambah lagi.   Kita yang terpaksa gadaikan gelang emas yang hanya seurat itu demi membesarkan anak-anak dan bukan yang basuh tangan dalam sinki emas.

Yang penting dan terutama sekali, di darjat mana pun kita ini, ialah  kita ingat Allah.  Yang susah selalu terpancul dari mulutnya Ya Allah ya tuhan ku.. Ya Allah, bantu la aku.. Itu satu kelebihan yang amat besar kalau di bandingkan dengan yang senang.....

Bako national park

We have made early plans for Bako National Park, without having an inkling what Bako is all about except that it is one of the have -to- visit places in Sarawak.

Making plans with doctors is not easy. Its a race against time. You must have an  open mind because there can be a new case as they are walking out,  last minute clerking or discharging of patients that can change their 5 minutes into 1 hour. So just switch on the radio or read something while waiting. And since 3 doctors are going to Bako with us, we have to be ready to be aware of the time.

On that particular day, it was sunny but there  was  one big black cloud  looming above us.  If it rains, the boats would  not take us and that worries Aishah . As usual with her, she excellerated,  to the jetty,  racing against clouds.

As soon as we got there, I saw a sign that says BEWARE OF CROCODILES. You mean, the crocs have the guts to come close or crawl up to the jetty? With all these people and houses? Wow!  I am happy I have done my 2 rakaat salat ( I heard about the crocs) .

The boat was more a big sampan with engine. It does not have a roof.  In case it rains,   we brought our umbrellas.  The small 3 passenger only at one time boat took us from the river into the sea! And since the sea was very choppy in this rainy season,  it was one hell of a ride.  We could see Aishah bouncing up and down as the boats were going against the strong tide and she could see us bouncing up and down. The engine and sound of tide drown  my reading of the Ayat Kursi.

My mind was going, 'where in the world is this Bako place anyway?'  I mean, we actually have to cross the sea!!!!

After half an hour, the boat man  started to navigate to the shores.  We saw many bakau trees, big boulders and plenty of vegetation ahead with  a not- so- big Bako National Park sign.  If I had imagine, the park is something like a safari, boy, was I wrong.  There is nothings catered for  visitors,  Everything is left as it is. With some few wooden houses.   A remote island ( is it an island? If it is, why doesnt it say Bako island?) or a remote place with wooden bridges and walk ways  raised from waters  that rise  in the evenings. It is also a place where we have to track away, tracking through  paths  to their information office, the forest  and the beach.

So track  we did, to see the big nosed monkeys and venus fly trap plants.  At first, we were all gamed, so we walked in the bushes and trenches and squeezed  in between trees and stones to get to this spot and there we saw  many monkeys with big noses.  Shaz couldnt see the nose,  since the monkeys purposely showed us their tails instead. But I noticed they were decending lower and lower so I asked everyone to flee quickly.

To see the venus fly trap,  we have to track into another direction and this time the track paths were more challenging as we have to ascend to that spot.  It looked difficult and just us 6 ladies exploring the jungle  to see a plant, we decided not to. I admit I was  a coward in there , since I have never been in  a forest.  I always shirk  away from forest, jungles or even tok chek's  woody backyard in the kampung.  Maybe being born in the big city, I am not in the element with  forests  and jungles but nevertheless, Bako was back to nature, and nature is always good for the soul.

As we drove back  from the jetty, the raindrops started,  then it  rained cats and dogs, while we think of our next adventure.

Market lover

There are many wonderful things you can see by going to the market.  I am saying this because Kuching has one of the best markets I have ever seen. But of course, I have not seen alot of markets in this world, since I have not travel that far and wide, but still, Satok market, on Saturday and Sunday is indeed busting with all sorts of  foodstuff, I was just blown away.

I love to go to markets, as I love to see what the people in different places eat.  But most of all, I want to see the kind of food Allah has created at different parts of the world.  Many things are the same, but there are also many which we do not find in Semenanjung.  I cannot tell you what, because when we ask, they say ' ta tau cakap'. There is this fruit that looks like flatten duku that has segmented sweet flesh but rounder seeds which turns out to be quite good.

If you love to cook,  you can  go crazy and do not know what to buy first.  And if you have no self control, you will end up overweight.

Alhamdulillah syukur to Almighty Allah for giving us the good food we eat, the many kinds we find at Satok market.

There will be more picnics, insyaAllah.

Picnics are fun especiallly with loved ones.  Food cooked and packed from home are less expensive then food you buy outside and taste better too. Picnic is eating outside of the house, in the fields, by the lakes, by the roadsides anywhere you like.

We had a picnic yesterday at Masjid Negeri Sarawak. Hajar's nasi lemak packed in the shape of pyramids in waxed paper. Sambal ikan bilis  and bite-size  pieces chicken rendang were  put separately in plastic containers.  We had 'celorot' for desert. It is a Sarawak traditional kueh made of rice flour,  and most probably steamed into  short flutes,  made out of coconut leaves.  It is so creative, cute and delicious too.

Today we had another picnic. This time by the roadside.  Sambal tumis big prawns bought at Satok market early in the morning when we sent aishah to hospital ( at 5.00am!) , fried fish and masak lemak nangka muda. For desert we had kek lapis sarawak.

I plan to purchase a proper picnic basket as soon as possible, so that we can pack the food in a more orderly way and less spills.

I think picnics will be in many of our outing plans in the future., because sitting around a basket of food and eating together is to me, alot of fun.

Nyum nyum

Yummy yummy yummy!!
my sis is a fabulous cook! (ok,second to mama :P)
from kuzi to ayam pedas to even sardines, she cooks very well :)
and i dont mind eating the same boring plain chicken porridge for lunch everyday, because when i go back i know the dinner will be yummylicious!
and today i ate 3 plates of nasi n ayam pedas!

puffing my cheek further and further.

zam zam alakazam!hahha

itchy head, talking cat

my head is very itchy..uwaaaaaaaaaa..silap beli shampoo i think..but mama said 'dont waste money, just wear the shampoo!'..huhu..n shushu talks again..oh oo..so mi spray ubat kutu on her skin n now shu duwant to b my fren anymore..mama balik je shu x layan mi..uwaaaa................................im hungry..mama masak chip, n sosej, n telo, n stimmed cauliflower 4 dinner! simple n pimple!

sory 4 the bad grammar~

Sarawak

I am at shah alam home. Why do I say shah alam home? Do we have other homes???

At this point of our lives we find ourselves arriving at a new land, Sarawak. Before this, we only read about Sarawak in our geography book in secondary school, and occasionally we watch its cultures and Sarawakians on tv.  We watch pieces on long-houses,  their dances, accent and costumes, Sarawak is very much Malaysia but far away in many sense.

Now, we are in Kuching, Sarawak.  And I like being there. It has an inherent system about it and everyone go about their lives without much stress. Hajar thinks its the long-house effect and it might be true.

Rainbow

and there she goes again. flying here and there.
jumping from 1 plane to another.

today i reminded myself again.
there are some facts and situation in life that we have to accept. we plan and Allah also plans, but He is the best planner. some things are beyond our control, too vague to see, too complex to understand. it's true that Allah works in miraculous ways.

this life is indeed a test. sometimes it's painted with bright colours, sometimes it's dull and dark. but as the saying goes, life is like a rainbow, it takes sunshine and rain for its colours to appear.

it hurts to think about the past. the hardships, the things we expected and deserved, the happiness that seems not belonging to us, the hunger, the fear, the hesitations, the stress and breakdowns. but those were in old days, we should not let it haunt our lives forever. we live for today, and thankful for what we have. if we really count Allah's blessings that He showers upon us, we are actually in a good state. it's just that in some aspects we are less fortunate. but deep inside we know that this worldly life is just temporary, what we want is to be happy in the hereafter.

so lets be happy and redha with whatever we have.

Mesti ade petua, jangan kosong

Hari ni hari jumaat. Niatnya tiap-tiap hari jumaat nak tazkirah lah sikit-sikit.Kalau kena bukak kitab yang berlambak-lambak ni, saya akan bukak.  Usaha yang tak seperti untuk amar makruf. Untuk semua yang baca blog saya ni, terutama sekali azharul hayati .

Hari ni saya nak kongsi amalan-amalan yang telah di ajar kepada saya oleh orang orang 'lama'. Orang orang yang hebat. Kita mesti ade petua .Tak boleh kosong, tanpa perisai. Entah ape ade kat luar sana.  Kalau kita dengar cerita orang dahulu, mereka  hebat, sebab mereka penuh dengan syarat-syarat tubuh mereka. Di sini, saya turunkan pada semua pembaca, bukan syarat tubuh, tetapi syarat hidup. hehehe

Mula-mula sekali. betulkan niat kerana Rasullulah saw bersabda, Sesungguhnya pekerjaan itu dengan niat. So, sebelum buat ape-ape, periksa niat dulu kerana, kesudahan yang baik hanya terjadi dari niat yang baik.

Pertama, jagalah Allah dan Allah menjaga kamu. Jagalah hubungan dengan Allah supaya Allah sayang dan jaga kita. Apa yang Allah suruh buat, kita tak ikut. lepas tu selalu get into trouble.

Kedua, Untuk tangani stress, Istighfar. Banyakkan istighfar kerana ia membuat kehidupan kita lebih tenang dan mudah.

Ketiga. Keluar rumah, bacalah 4 qul dan ayat kursi supaya di lindungi Allah dari seribu satu macam dugaan.

Keempat.Bila di timpa musibah, baca Innalila wainnailaihirojiun. Kerana semuanya dari Allah belaka. Tak kira, musibah kecil atau besar, doa ini bukan untuk kematian sahaja. Ia untuk semua jenis musibah. Hilang handphone, hilang kucing, hilang kekasih. Lagi pedih hati tu, lagi kerap baca dan topup dengan Lahaulawalakuwataillabillahil 'aliyil azhim. 

Kelima. Pemanis muka, Selawat tafrijiah dan sedekahkan  senyum anda.

Keenam. Pemudah. Untuk memudahkan sesuatu pekerjaan yang mencabar, baca robi yassir wala u'assir ya tammamu bi khair

Ketujuh. Bila tak ade jalan keluar  buntu dan confuse,  baca ayat seribu dinar.

Kelapan. Pemanis mulut.  Robbisyrohli.....

Kesembilan. Bila nak travel, buatlah 2 rakaat solah musafir. Banyak kali saya di'jaga' bila travelling dengan amalan ini.

Kesepuluh. Pemutih muka. Ambil wuduk sebelum subuh . Baca doa basuh muka ketika ambil wuduk. Allahuma baiyidh wajhi yauma tabyadhu wujuhun wa taswadu wujuhun. (kena check balik)

Itu sajalah untuk hari ini. Nanti sambung lagi. Saya rasa kita selalu baca dalam buku2 doa semua yang tetulis di atas tapi kita tak amal. Ape guna cari ilmu tapi tak amal. Buang masa baca buku, buang duit beli buku. Untuk saya, sikit pun takpe, asalkan istikomah sebab lagi lama kita amal, lagi berkesan.

Lagipun, ada macam-mcam  ilmu kat luar sana, yang baik yang tak baik. Yang sesat pun banyak. Amalan amalan ni sekadar membantu kuatkan sikit diri kita yang banyak sangat kelemahan ni,  insyaAllah.

Oh ye....pengeras dia.....paling penting....IKHLAS KERANA ALLAH

We are what we eat

I read this book written by a doctor on emm....brains.  Here it says, "the brain is connected to the body not only through the nervous system, but also through the more ancient system of chemical regulations which means whatever enters our bloodstream, from cekodok to nasi kerabu (changed to suit malaysian taste) , may effect the brain in a matter of seconds".

I would like to link the article to a hadith that says, to this  effect  'eat the good in what  is provisioned to you'. We are asked to choose and eat the good things . Before the scientist studied the brain, Islam has already taught us how to take care of our health. To begin with, Islam asks  us to eat good things.

Do you notice that good things have a nice appearence?  The animals that we are permitted to eat look  better then those we are not permitted to eat. With the exception of cats and poodles, fish, goats, cows and buffaloes look nicer than the lions, pigs and crocodiles. So,  one rule, see how the food looks like. Only cute animals  for me plz.

We see many verses in the Quran saying that Allah created fruits for humans. There are fruits in heaven too. Which emphasizes  the importance of fruits in our lives and as we already know,  the loads of vitamins that  we need, we get from fruits. And all the fruits that are mentioned in the Quran,  like the olives, dates, pommegranades and figs have the best quality of nutrients. That's why, I cannot,  not have fruits everyday.

Actually what I want to say here  is, what we eat effects what we think, as the book says.  Delving deeper, even the source of what we eat and the means of how we acquire what we eat,  play a part in  making who we are. Most importantly , we have to be more concern of what we put in our mouth to get better answers  from our brains.

what colour are you?

What do you think of colours?  I came across  a colour test and to my surprise they said that my aura is purple!!! I don't like purple, I like green. Blue comes close second. Orange makes me happy.  Brown feels very solid. What sort of person is purple?

It always amuses  me when I change the colours around us.  What if the tress are red,  the sky is green and the  wood  is blue  and the sea is brown and the earth is purple? Imagine opening your window and see pink clouds in the sky.  It would be totally unacceptable . It would be hard to stomach the whole scene. I would fall sick.

Allah had  made the world in the best choice of colours. Everything He created are beyond words. Allah is beautiful and He loves beauty.

Amar makruf

Saya ni tak pandai nak tazkirah. Pertama,  sebab saya ni  lemah lagi dalam amalan dan ibadat. Masih di takok lama,  perlu kekuatan untuk ibadat wajib. Pada hari-hari yang elok, bolehlah sambung amalan sunat, kalau tak,masa tu habis buat ape entah. lari sana, lari sini, tak kesudahan.

Tapi pagi  ni, teringin nak amar makruf. Amar makruf tu satu suruhan Allah yang amat penting untuk survival iman kite. Pengaruh di sekeliling kita ni banyak yang tak berasas agama. Surat khabar, majalah, tv lebih banyak menarik kita untuk leka dan hanyut. Melainkan bila bertemu kita dengan usaha2  amar makruf nahi mungkar.

Semua orang nakkan hidup yang senang. Nak rezeki yang luas, nak cinta yang sejati, nak ilmu yang jadikan hidup kita lebih baik. Dan kita akan bersyukur apabila kita dapat semua ni. Sebenarnya Allah berikan kita nikmat dalam hidup ni untuk kita buat sesuatu dengan nya.  Dengan duit tu senang, sedeqah, zakat, tapi dengan rezeki  selainnya? Masa senang, ilmu, ketenangan, kasih sayang , kesihatan. Ini semua nikmat Allah pada kita.

Banyak perkara yang kita boleh buat, Tak boleh buat yang besar, yang kecik pun Allah nampak jugak. How kecik? Baca sepipi Alqur'an atau baca sepotong ayat atau hadith pada keluarga kita, buka channel islamic di tv atau radio dan lain-lain.

Yang besar pulak banyak sangat dan amat baik kalau kita boleh buat. Kena berani susah sampai jadi pendokong-pendokong agama yang sambung usaha-usaha orang yang terdahulu. Susah tu...tapi tak mustahil...

Overgrown babies

Even we are now 3 should-be adults, we are more or less like 3 overgrown babies.
It's so funny that at this age we still need mama.
But u know what mama?
I'll tell u a secret.
And here it goes:

The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said: "Whoever has three daughters, cares and provides for them, and shows them mercy, will enter Paradise ." (Imam Bukhari's Book of Muslim Morals and Manners)

Its tough to be a doctor.

Having aishah a doctor has revealed to me the hardship of becoming one.  Before this, I have great admiration for doctors, not to mention the crushes. To me,  they are always above the rest. Something about the way they carry themselves, the way they dress, is as though Allah has given them an extra edge above us simple folks. Now,  I realise, that comes as a compensation  for all their  toils and troubles.

I have asked kementerian kesihatan about this hard enough to leave housemanship and they said it is a test of endurance so that they can handle all kinds of patients when they become full-fledged doctors. The trouble is, some did not stay long enough to be one.

I only have a vague idea of the tagging, clerking and the rounds she tells me she does. I do not know  what the job entails  because she does not have  the time to tell me.  Other then being on call,  when she comes back, she only has strength left to pray, chew her food and walk to bed.  The rest of it is used up at the hospital.

Picipu, I hope you can hang on there. I know words like noble job, saving lives and highly paid and very respected   have lost their  meaning  to you,  the words  pahala and ganjaran are also losing their  lustre too,  but you are doing a good job...and something good will come out of it,  InsyaAllah.

Mimi can drive

First I want to congratulate mimi for making it home yesterday.Anak sape ni?!! That was a long way to drive alone. But I know she is  a spunky young women  who loves to drive. Just remember, keep to your lane, calmly drive on, follow the rules and if you are not sure, go slow. Ignore all the honks from impatient people. Concentrate on not killing anyone with your driving.

Yesterday's flight was very turbulent. Most of the time I was whispering the kalimah to myself. Until the stewardess announced that we were landing soon,  that I stopped worrying.  With every touch down a plane makes,  I will give the pilots their grading. Superb, smooth or terrible. I remember their names and I look forward to have them flying the next plane I will be on.

If only we are all together here. One will always be away. Now it is mimi and shushu. Before, it was Aishah, before that, hajar. The nest is full only during public holidays when everyone fly home. Only my prayers that Allah keep them safe,  make the absence easier on the heart.

Get a grip on your thoughts

Assalamualaikum

I want to share this newsletter i received this morning. Let's apply it.
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Remember: control your thoughts or they will control you. If you don't control
your thoughts, you'll do what a lot of people do and that's crash. Imagine
you're in a BMW and you press the accelerator but don't make an effort to
control the steering wheel. What happens? Sooner or later, you're going to
crash because you didn't take control of the car. How much more control should
you take of your own mind?

To illustrate this point, I want you to read the following sentences aloud.

Sentence 1: Aishah, you're the happiest guy on earth. Everybody loves
you because you're so nice and sincere. You're dependable, trustworthy, and
you're what every person would want in a true friend. Nobody has anything bad
to say about you.

Sentence 2: Aishah, you're a total loser. You're nothing. You're a joke.
Everybody dislikes you and stays as far away from you as possible. Nobody cares
about you. You don't make a difference at all.

Notice the shift in your attitude and how quickly your smile turned upside down
after reading the second sentence. Let's break down what happened in your mind as you read both sentences.

When you read those sentences, you thought of pictures in your head and
those pictures evoked feelings which then went straight into your subconscious
mind, which then resulted in the corresponding shift in attitudes and actions.
Note that the sentences were colored with emotion. This is important because
emotion penetrates to the subconscious mind like no other. If you emotionalize
your thoughts, you can reach the subconscious that much faster. Think back to
all those stories of people who've achieved great goals. They had thoughts of
what they wanted to do and they colored those thoughts with emotion, powerful
emotions such as desire.


But you know what the sad thing is Aishah? Most people are constantly
thinking in terms of Sentence #2 (hopefully not as severe though). They are
always thinking in terms of negative thoughts and as a result, their attitudes
and actions match those thoughts accordingly. How can we reverse this process?

On any given day, there are probably a million thoughts that go through your mind.
The first thing I want you to do is just become aware of them. Really become
aware of just how powerful they are. (You probably do know just how powerful
they are now from just doing that example and from reading the previous 2 lessons.)

Now that you're aware that your thoughts hold great power, the next thing I
want you to do is just listen. Really listen to what's going on there. You might be
surprised as to what you find out. Some of you might find that you've been thinking
in terms of Sentence #2 (hopefully not as bad as that), but something to that degree.

"I'm not smart enough." "I can't do that." "That's impossible."

Your subconscious mind is listening to all that and it's saying: "Ok. Got it.
Now I'll just influence your attitudes and actions to prevent you from achieving
any goal from now on because you think it's impossible. Because you think you
can't do it. Because you think you're not smart enough."

Remember, your subconscious mind is just following the orders of your conscious
mind. Some people think thoughts like that on a continuous basis and it's because
they think those kinds of thoughts that they automatically dismiss any notion
of trying to achieve anything. You know who these people are. You bring up an idea
and they'll say:

"That'll never work." "There's too much risk." "It'll never happen."

So I want you to really listen and see what you're thinking. One way to keep track
of your thoughts is to write them down, preferably 3 times per day. Once in the
morning, once in the afternoon, and once before you go to sleep. Just transfer
what's in your head on to paper. Don't try to change the thoughts in between
because you'd just be defeating the whole purpose. Just let it out. That way,
you can get a true snapshot of what's going in there. Many people who've tried
this were surprised as to what was actually going on in their minds.

Now that you're aware of your thoughts and have listened to them, what I want
you to do now is catch the negative thoughts that come into your head. Don't let
them slip by. They're very sly so catch them in the act. For example, many students
in school may think:

"I'm not smart enough".

Catch that thought in the act, choose a replacement and back that replacement up.

"I may not have the highest GPA, but I'm smart in the sense that I know when I
need to go and ask for help as well as how to gather the correct resources to help
me better understand the material."

Ideally, you want to do this automatically, but it won't happen overnight. It'll take
some time. That's why optimistic people are so happy. They've already gone through
that process several times so they habituated it so it's like there's never any
negative thinking to begin with.

Most people are oblivious to the fact that they can change their thoughts. You have
the power to choose what to think. You're not an animal that automatically reacts to
its environment. You have the ability to choose what to think which leads you to
actions that correspond to those exact thoughts you've chosen.

It's really easy to think negative. Standards imposed by society tell us how we should
look like, what we should eat, wear, do with our lives, etc. You are getting impressed
from people from all over so it's really eas for others to do the thinking FOR you.
It's always an uphill battle until you develop the habit of thinking for yourself. Once
you do that, it's a great liberating feeling.

Think of your mind as a hose out of control spraying every which way. You want
to grab control of the hose, turn off the negative thoughts that are spewing out, and
hook up your hose to positive thoughts and spew those onto your subconscious mind
to influence your future thoughts and actions to be conducive to them.

leaving

At the wake of my blogging,  I am actually about to leave for kucing, to help aishah  face the gruelling days as a new doctor. I am tired of changing houses but the situation calls for it. The arrows seems to be pointing to that direction  and even when we reason out of it, the arrows are not changing it course. For this, I put my  future in kucing in  the hands of Allah and His plans.  Kucing is a nice place. It is less  busy, less conjested, wider than kl. Here the  buildings are increasing by the minute, bigger and higher. Out of nowhere you see them coming into form, more modern in features, more outstanding.  Kl's growth  is startling  but choking, at times.

I pray kucing offers good experiences for our family. It will be a good change of air. New faces and new places.  I pray over there at bumi kenyalang, we can make ourselves useful. In 2 days we  will leave, insyaAllah....

My first words

Assalamualaikum. In the name of Allah the most merciful and beneficient. My highest praise to Him the Almighty who has bestowed upon me the ability to cope with my life and the deepest gratitute for giving me many beautiful and wonderful gifts which are; First and foremost, the gift of iman, to help me get a grip. Second, my larger than life parents. Then comes my sweet daughters who are my azharul hayati, an arabic term I invented long time ago for them, and my siblings . Also for the few dear friends who have shared their friendship with me. And for my relatives, their houses to stop over whenever I go back to my 'village'. Though all of them are not big in number, they are certainly big in their personalities. I have always wondered why are they so few, now I realised that these few are the harder ones to come by. And maybe, the dosage is more than I can handle .

Before I even start to write, I would like to apologise, if my words will offend anyone.Mainly this blog is for my daughters to read. Not enough I am always nagging them, now I have a blog too to nag them. Hmmm....I wonder how long it can be kept. Could their children read it too one day? Hmm...from their nenek who speaks english and writes a blog.....

My plan is to show some sides of our lives, who is doing what, what is happening where, how to do what and share with you whatever knowledge that I have. I have always been facinated by words and pictures. Unfortunately, I do not have a life that people want to read about. Unless you are into miseries. But please read on because I will always try to, well, keep it positive.