Married

Assalamualaikum!

I have been away for quite a while.  That's how long it takes for me to fit in my  new role as mother-in-law and planning a wedding.  Yup, I am now a mother-in-law.  And my daughter Picipu, is married.

It is a new phase, where you have a new person in your family.  With Gio-gio being the only male in the house all these while, we now have a real guy, a tall one.

We had been 4 peas in a pod for a long time, something like Mama Pea and 3 little peas, fighting the adversaries , and beating the odds, using all the tricks that I had under my green hat .  Now one pea has springed out and  is on her own way.  My magic hat would no longer be necessary for it too has warned out from the wears and tears.

All that is needed now are my prayers. Which I would do,  forever and ever.

surviving the test of time

Time and time again, life would test us as we sail it. Small wind, strong wind,  tornado or Tsunami.  If you are lucky, just bumpy soft waves giving you a nudge.

Not many would be able to survive the test that comes to rip everything apart.  Except for the strongest root, standing steadfast, holding on to it's dear life, never letting go.  

In the end, we would know who deserves the best of us.

Back to little business

For 2 weekends we did not sell at the flea market.  I missed it so.  I did not realize that I like doing business.  Selling Hajar's cookies.  I don't know if I would enjoy or not selling other stuff.  Hmmm.....

So last Tuesday, there I was, queuing up to get a table.  Went out early in the morning, earlier than usual, thinking I was early.  When I got there the queue was half the length of the normal full length.  All were sitting cross-legged, legs stretched out or lying down, and some, actually sleeping. I hear they come to register for a table as early as 5.30am. Wow.

I was prepared with a novel. 'Cinta didalam gelas' by Andrea Hirata.  So I joined the rest and sat down on the floor and started reading.  Unfortunately, books do makes me smile or laugh openly.  I can mask the tears, but cannot smother the smiles or laughs so for the 3 hours of queue I hope I did not come across as the loony or weird cookie seller, smiling and giggling to herself.  3 hours is a long time to control my response to the book (lama tuuu) and Andrea Hirata without fail would make me go that way, moving my emotions.  His books are sooooooo good. By the way, the young man infront of me, drums on the railings and sing.  But he does it rather well.

So this weekend, back to our little business.  Wish us luck.  We are adding a new product. Biskut Suji.  So now there are 4 big glass jars of cookies sold per piece.  Choc Chip, Choc Chip Raisins, Shortbread and Biskut Suji, InsyaAllah.

Hihi.

Cat people

The other day I bought a tent for the cats.  It is in a shape of a castle.  Really cute. Will show picture.  I thought that could be a kennel for them since Gio-gio as usual, pissing everywhere.  Maybe they should be confined at the balcony, and retire into the 'castle' and not come into the house.  Alas, no go. They prefer to be in the house, where they can scratch the furnitures, sleep on the dining table and curl up on the comforters.  They don't want no castle.  First it became the place where we put the litter boxes, their toilet and eventually, we packed it up.  Not working.

When Dr Ja came to the house, she commented when she saw the castle, "Aunty dapat banyak pahala buat baik kat kucing".

Actually there are people who are much kinder to cats than I am.  For example Picipu's lecturer. They have many cats, 9 or more, each taken cared of with much love and  individual attention.  Picipu told me that one of the cats love to sleep on the laptop that the lecturer decided to buy another laptop so that she does not have to disturb the cat. She is willing to spend that much for the love of her cat.  If you ask me, whether I would do the same with  Shu-shu, Gio-gio and Tutty, I would say, "are you nuts?".  Put in her place, I would just remoooooovvvvve the cat to one side, use the laptop. If she sleeps on it again, I would do the same thing. Just remoooooovvvvve the cat.

Adi told me that  once, while she was doing her work at this mall in JB, there was this shop owner whom, every evening, would cook rice and fish.  So Adi went and ask him if that was his dinner.  He said no,  it is for cats. (he, mind you) It seems on the way back to his home, he passes this place where there are alot of cats, but no food.   He took pity on them and would cook before he leaves the work place to feed them everyday.  Everyday.

This guy, is going to heaven.

Baking

I love baking.  Unfortunately I cannot bake because I cannot eat what I bake, since I have to go on a diet, ingredients are expensive, and it is wastage not to eat what I bake.  Many limitations.  But I love to bake.

I started to bake when I was in Std 4.  I would peruse my mother's recipe book endlessly, just drooling over the captivating delicious pictures of all sorts of cakes, biscuits and pies.  I still remember the day I baked my first cake. Honey cake.  It turned out well.  I dare say so because even when my mum scolded me for actually baking a cake and not just imaginary baking when I play house, she had served some to my tuition teacher, Miss Procter. Miss Procter said that it was a good cake. For a 10 year old.  Then I was banned from baking.

When I moved back to KL, my baking utensils were among the selected things I brought back here. Other than my Arab books, my English books and my sewing machine. My few 'harta'.

Hajar has taken over the baking.  And if I let myself, I can start baking too. But baking but not eating is too difficult.

There is this cute bakery in the neighbourhood called Lil' Haven.  I befriended the owner, Su and have gone to buy her cakes many times, telling her how much I like her bakery, for her to keep it going and recommended my family and friends to buy from her.  We can eat there too. And if there is a vacancy at her shop, yours truly will be the first to apply.

Mother daughter cronicles.

Reading Amy Tan's book is one emotional journey.  The main theme of her books is mother and daughter relationship which tells us about her probably most greatest influence in her llife, her mum.

I identify with stories like this.  It touches many many chords in me.  That I end up so wretched.  Amy Tan is brilliant, just like Adeline Mah, two great chinese writers that have found their way dealing with their lives and their pains, hence their bestseller books.

I do not have that great talent in language to write like them.  But at  my level, write I shall because these itchy finger are real.  If Amy Tan says, writing keeps her from going crazy, well, writing simply makes me happy.

Mother daughter.  This runs deep. Me and me mum. My mother and I. Now the girls and I.  Life do not wish for other type of challanges for me other than what comes under this subject.  I are not getting away from this all grand-scale  knots or ties or binds . Ever ever.

Then again, for all that we went through, deep down, where it is pure and true, one thing rings, we are one, right till the end.

The last day for my mother, we were all at the intensive care in USM, Kubang Kerian. I was there for already many days.  Family, relatives and friends came to visit.  Mami was getting weaker and weaker, drawing further and further.  In the afternoon, those who were close to her, whom I know in their hearts wants to be with her at that critical time, went home for lunch and would come back after that, was never meant to be.

I had to see them out since the elderly ones were quite lost in the hospital corridors.  As I saw them out of the gate for visiting hours, I really heard my mum calling me in my heart.  It says, "come quick, I am leaving".  So clear.  I ran.

A few of us were still there. For many hours, she had been oblivious to those around her or what is going on.  Somehow Mami turned to my direction.  Signaled me to come close to read the kalimah.  Of all people, she called me, the offspring she scolded and scrowled at the most.  The one she never showed any sign of approval. The one she always 'put down'.

I read the kalimah even after she had breathed her last breath and closed her eyes.  I wanted to read it all the way up there.

That is how it is.  Underneath all the miserable memories, beyond what lies on the surface, whatever said and done, the bind never broke.

cubaan membunuh kucing. MEOOOWWW

hye ma, ecah, hajar and people!! tgk ni kucim ni pandai blakon! homaigod!